The high cost of being a perfectionist.

Growing up, I used to often wonder why I never got into an argument concerning the heftier concerns in life - say politics, existentialism,the fate of mankind etc etc! - or into debates, discussions and diatribes. I am OK with one on one conversations but the moment I am faced with a group of people my knees turn to water! I used to wonder why...
Now after decades of soul searching I have come to some sort of conclusion: I didn't want to come off looking like an idiot.I didn't want to be thought of as an ignoramous. I didn't want to be laughed at. And, most importantly, I didn't ever want to be thought of as less than perfect in everything I did, do and know.
That I think is a problem with quite a few people!
People who carry a personal responsibility for the failures of others - friends, family and colleagues. People who take it as a personal affront when others fail the company, the job, the assignment.
While, as a boss, one is of course accountable but beyond a point one cannot carry the load for the rest of the world or at least folks one has to work with. There is a limit to accountability, responsibility and carrying the can. Even Steve Jobs and Bill Gates can't be held responsible for hardware failures and software glitches their products suffer from! Failings that their companies, and the workers therein, could be and should be held accountable for.
The problem is that a perfectionist will always feel that he/she is making excuses should some small cog in the corporate machine fail him/her. These individuals are convinced that in explaining failures of the system will be thought off as rationalising, and reflect badly on them. That they will be letting all and sundry down.
I don't agree. Because perfectionists very rarely fail nor will they allow others to fail them. Generally. But occasionally it does happen. A weak link in the chain does snap... and when that happens one shouldn't take on unbearable loads because under stress the strongest link can, in the greater scheme of things, suddenly become the weakest by snapping at a critical juncture, at the wrong time when everyone else is depending on that link standing firm and strong.
So my point is that sometimes one stops thinking and worrying about holding up the universe on one's shoulders and thinks solely of holding oneself up so that one survives the storm, lets the person concerned take the fall... Because it's most important that you remain strong to fight for the greater good another day.
At one point in my life I wanted to be superwoman: superwife, supermom and supercareer woman. I found out that not only was I not being "super" at anything, I was being less than adequate at everything.(I did fail as a wife after all. That too twice!) So I decided that I would have to be the best I could at the various jobs depending on the need of the hour. That made life much simpler for me and took the soul searching out of everyday life...
Perfectionism comes at a high cost. Sometimes the cost is not worth it...